Types of Characters
At every IT department I‘ve been to, and I‘ve been to many, you usually meet an assortment of the same types of characters. Here are some of them:-
1. There is the guy, usually from Technical Support
who fixes something for you, mutters whilst he is doing it, doesn‘t tell you what was wrong in the first place and often leaves without telling you if it is fixed or not.
2. There are the types of characters who are very good technically
but are hopelessly organised. It‘s a complete disaster when this type gets promotion. It‘s one of the main reasons that projects go over time and budget.
3. There is the manager at the office
who thinks that the girls at the office are all impressed with his power and majesty, and who doesn‘t realise that they are all calling him an old pervert behind his back.
4. There is the types of characters who always goes out to the pub at lunchtime
, stay two hours instead of one, comes back reeking of booze and don‘t think anyone notices. However, everyone at the office talks about them as the office boozers.
5. There is usually one girl at the office who wants all the guys to fancy her
. She wears revealing outfits and makes knowing eyes when she meets any guys in the corridor.
The more dangerous ones of the species may sit on a guy‘s desk while talking to him or accidentally touch his hands while they are both pointing to something on the screen. It‘s just a tease though.
There‘s no point in acting on this, as she‘ll just tell the other girls to beware of you as you had tried it on with her.
Often the other girls don‘t like her, and talk about her behind her back – they notice it too.
6. There is the contractor
who drives up in a flash car every day, and when a menial task is to be done (e.g. making the coffee) will tell a permanent person to do it as ‘my time is more expensive to the company than yours’.
7. There are always the types of characters at the company who are part of the furniture
. They have never had a promotion and are never likely to, but they are too afraid of the big bad world to try their luck elsewhere.
8. There‘s always the types of characters who likes to cause trouble
or get someone else into it. If ever they find a problem in a program in test or in production, they will always make sure that everyone knows, especially the boss, what an idiot the person was who wrote the program.
Most problems when found are quite simple, so the creator of the problem has no real response.
9. Occasionally there is the born-again proselytizing religious one
, who will often try to bring you to the faith when you get left in a one-to-one situation with them. You make a mental note not to let that happen too often.
10. Another one that you might find is the health-food and clean-air freak
. They were really in their prime when smoking was allowed in offices.
Then they used to have all sort of contraptions on their desk to purify the air and ionise the atmosphere.
Nowadays they usually just content themselves with telling people what red meat does with their intestines, or explaining what they make sausages from, now that they can‘t wave their hands, hold their noses or grimace any time a smoker comes near.
11. Then there‘s the curse of us all
– there‘s the person who comes into the office even when suffering from a terrible cold or flu because he or she feels that the department needs them.
Most people just want the bugger to go home and not give them flu – especially the contractors who will lose pay if they are off.
For some reason, the ‘˜hero‘ will always need to be very close to you at some point of the day.
Your instincts are to tell them to XXXX off, but you content yourself by trying not to breath in much air whilst he or she is near you.
Those are eleven types of characters you find in an IT department. If you know of others let us know in the Comments section below.
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