Types of Interviewer
This article, about the two types of Interviewer, was submitted as Comments after one of our recent articles by Arrgh (not sure if that is his or her real name).
The Two Types of Interviewer
There are two types of interviewer that you need to “please” before they roll out the red carpet.
1. The self-important, deluded and power-drunk HR person who somehow, goodness knows why, has convinced themselves that they represent all the “good things” about the organisation they work for.
2. The techy freak who has spent all night researching the totally pointless, irrelevant and most awkward questions they can ask you in front of (3) (see below) to convince themselves that (3) must be under the impression they are very good by their pathetic antics.
3. The manager who wants the job done but has to rely on (1) and (2) to find the “right person”.
The Interview Process
So, when you arrive, within seconds – NOT minutes – person (1) takes a look at you and goes through the following process:
a) Is the person appropriately dressed for our org?
b) Hmm, do they “look old” – my God! they do !
c) Quick, I need to just ask some retentive questions just to play for time.
By now you may begin to wonder why on earth they asked you to interview in the first place.
Somehow you make it through the bewilderingly inane questions that prove that person (1) has not even read your CV.
Then person (2) gets a go.
They seem almost frothing at the mouth with eagerness to trip you up and prove to you that your CV is a complete work of fantasy.
If you do manage to tackle their questions they will see how many really useful questions you can answer along the lines of “what does Error xxx mean then?”
As for person (3), well, they don’t really matter by the time you get the sort of treatment described before you see them.
By now, if you are “tool old” then person (1) will have already dreamt up what reason person (3) is to be given for your unsuitability and if you are not then freaky features (2) will have concocted a damaging technical profile to seal your fate.
The Recruitment Agency
To cap it all, the agency (yes, you know, the bunch of monkeys that are desperate to convince you of their brotherly love for you) will be told that they really must work on their tricks to catch anyone that may be “too old” and if freaky features is really disappointed with you, they will also tell them that you are technically useless.
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