Like many contractors, I’ve often given time to working out what the prefect contract would be. Here are some factors that would take a contract high up in my estimation:-
Location
The location would have to be excellent. I’ve worked in a nice setting outside Paris as well as in Holland and in Germany, and one of the best contracts I’ve had was in visiting all the nuclear sites in England and Wales for Nuclear Electric to take their requirements. All their power stations are in beauty spots in places like Snowdonia, Anglesey, Romney Marsh etc. and a few days spent at the local hotel on full expenses was very nice.
However, I think if I would be able to pick a spot, it would be somewhere where there was a lot of sun, sea and sand. Somewhere like Barbados or in the South Seas would be nice. It is also important that it would be very cheap to live there, so that I could save most of my contract money for when I went home, but I could still live like a king eating the best foods at the best restaurants and going to the best nightspots.
Flexitime would be a must here, as one wouldn’t want to spend the bulk of one’s time watching it out the window.
I would suggest that 9 o’clock to 1:30 pm would be fine, followed by a two and a half hour stint between 5 o’clock in the evening till 7:30 pm.
That way you could have the afternoon off at the beach or to have a very extended lunch, or a swim in the swimming pool at the house where you live (at very cheap rent), and then go back for your short stint in the evening.
Leaving work at 7:30 pm, you could get yourself something to eat and then prepare for the evening’s revelry. They would be very understanding at work if you were out late and came in late every so often, as that is the kind of people they are – fairly relaxed.
Money
At this location, they would have been so desperate to get the person that they needed, with the skills that you have, that they had to pay well over the odds for it – perhaps twice as much as you would get in Britain.
As the country is so cheap, as I said earlier, you would be able to bank most of this.
Of course, they would be worried that you would leave (with your skills) before the project was complete. They would, of course, have a hefty bonus built into your contract to make sure that you stayed to the end of the project. You might even build in performance bonuses where you would get a heft tax-free lump of money every time a milestone was passed on time on your part of the project.
People
It is in your best interests that the people are fairly relaxed, none of them is too interested in knocking themselves out, and that they are not of the highest standard anyway – that makes it a lot easier for you to both make tons of money, have a good time, and stand a great chance of being kept on, as you’re considered a bit of a guru.
It’s also important that the people are friendly and want to socialise with you, and show you all the best spots on the island or the country. You would, hopefully, be invited back to their homes to sample some local cooking, topped up with some of the local beverage.
It is important that the place is not too touristy, as you want to have some novelty value. This is important so that the guys feel privileged to introduce you to their friends, and the girls feel privileged to be seen around with you.
Editor’s Note: A paragraph has been deleted here.
Project
The project should be such that, not only will you be able to use your own skills, but you are able to pick up very valuable skills as well. In fact your client or employer will make sure you get all the training you need.
The deadlines are fairly relaxed, mainly because the people are fairly relaxed, not highly skilled, and the management like to enjoy life as well. Hopefully the senior management are remote, at least in another country, and preferably on another continent, and don’t get to visit too often.
It’s even better if they ask you to make up your own schedule and timetable, as you are the only one with the skills to be able to estimate for work in your area.
If you happen to have been made Project Leader or Project Manager on the project, make sure that you appoint some keen young person who wants to get ahead as your deputy in order “to train someone up from the company on leading projects with that skill”.
This person can do most of the grunt work for you like tracking progress, and putting all the schedules onto PMW or MS Project, which is a bit of a bind. You can send them around each week asking about progress.
Note:- Any of those people who have acted as my deputy on projects, and who are members of NamesFacesPlaces as well, should not read anything too much into this.
Anyone Else?
There were a few other factors that I could have written about as well that would make for a good project, but I’m feeling a bit relaxed now, and am going to have some breakfast followed by a nice walk along the shore. It’s a lovely day outside.
If anyone else has any ideas, or other factors, about what would make a good project, or have even worked on projects in nice spots that would make us all jealous, please write to us and we may publish it.
The crucial High Court IR35 verdict will be announced on Friday at 10pm. We should have news of it soon after. Keep you eye on the site.
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